Anders is in a very critical stage of his growth – at 3 years old, he is literally CRYING & WHINING to get what he wants.
Initially, I gave in to him, thinking he was on medication since he had Hand, Food & Mouth during the week of 21 – 25 April 2007. Now that he has recovered, he seems to get a ‘hang’ of the crying thingy.
I am much stressed and my patience is really running very low. I cannot stand it and sometimes, besides shouting at him, I used the cane.
Last night, when he was home with me, he was playing with his toy and books. Everything was ok, and then suddenly he stops playing and start throwing his tantrums. He played with the SCV Digital box and I told him to stop, he refused. So I switched off the main, then he started crying and kicking.
I shouted to him to stop crying and brought him to take a shower. After showering, he was alright. Then I went to change and when I came back to his room, he was crying and one of my small cabinets of hankies was all GONE….
I looked around and there were no signs of anyone of them, I looked out of the windows and there they were, by the ledge. He threw them all out of the windows. He has been throwing things out – socks, his water bottle and now hankies. Adrian and I had scolded him and tell him the consequences but it falls on deaf ears.
So unable to hold back my anger, I caned him. He cried.
I really felt so helpless and frustrated with Anders, I am not sure what he is going to do next…: (
Looking back at Anthea at 3 years old, she was never like this. Of course, 1 child is different from another, but he is just too way out of track.
I think I need to go and do research to find out more on toddle’s behaviors, otherwise, I think I may fall into Depression being so stressed.
7 comments:
Oh dear! Anders must be in the terrible 3 stage! Be patient with him ya, hope he will pass the stage soon :)
Dear Astee
I suppose I'm not exactly the 'expert' in this area since I have only one kid but I kinda suspect Anders could possibly be reacting this way cos he misses Siti? My colleague who has 3 boys tells me that her 2nd boy is very unlike the elder and used to beat up the elder brother all the time. But now that there is a even younger baby who is the centre of attention, he has matured and changed in character towards being a caring gor-gor. Nevertheless, my colleague had 2 difficult years before the baby came along. I think boys grow up very differently from girls so they probably need a different parenting method. Dun be so depressed, perhaps reading up on more parenting books might help!
Hi LZmommy,
Indeed, i think it could be the Terrible 3 phase and i am really hoping that it get by fast...: (
astee
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Hi Nellie,
I would think so that boys are different from girls in certain way. Thanks for your encouragement and i will definitely try to read up more on this area.
astee
Hi Astee, a big hug to you. You have been great all along. A patient mommy. I must say that this must have a great impact on you. It's not an easy phase. It's a phase that must be handled carefully. I read that you caned anders when you are angry and reached your frustration limit. Please don't. What I mean is that do not cane when you are at your limit or angry. This is in turn make it worse. He may just listen for a while then repeat the same things again and again.
Whenever you are angry, calm down, then apply the rod. I used to be at my top of anger and frustration when I discipline Grace and realised that it didn't help. So, now whenever I'm upset or mad with her, I will leave her alone for a while then come back, speak to her, make sure she understand and apply the rod. After a few sessions, she is much better. Just my 2-cents worth.
Hope it's able to help you. I feel the pain too but I/you know that it's for their best interest at heart.
Take care. Hope you are better now.
Hi Jean,
Thanks for the encouragement. Yes, i will definitely try your suggestion.
Also, i try to let Adrian discipline him since he tend to listen to adrian more than me. Then i apply adrian style as well.
I am down but not out...: )
rgds,
astee
Hi Astee, the way Anders behaves sound so familiar. Yes, Iden is also doing that now! Just yesterday, I could not tahan anymore that I gave him a slap. I felt so heartache :-(
Well, I guess it is part and parcel of parenting. Hang in there. Things will be better soon.....
Hi Idy,
Thanks for dropping in, yeah, i reckon it's part & parcel of growing up stage.
So far, he's behaving better. I just keep my finger crossed that it will continued to be better each day.
cheers,
astee
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